America's Most Wanted

Transmission from Crochet CentCom Command to the Subcommandante Crochet Brigade:

Below are three counterfeit crochet handbags along with the dastardly ladies who produced them. their full identities have been protected with the discrete black "censored" boxes which either makes them look like wanted fugitives or like they're wearing incredibly futuristic rectangular sunglasses. ladies, don't worry, i will fully protect your real selves and won't tell the authorities when they hunt me down and come a-knockin' on my door, which i'm sure is going to happen any day now. your secrets are safe with me!


Anna in her secret hideout, showing off her handmade Chanel. Chic and dangerous, she is a shady lady with style...


Carrie with the infamous Dior tote, making a furtive daylight appearance before they can catch her...Quick! Back into the safehouse!


Ms. Diana on the lam from the authorities but taking a break to mug for the camera with the Dior that would land her in the slammer...Her impending baby will be born into the flames of crochet vice but the wee one's momma will show it how to successfully evade capture, i'm sure!

Will update on a need-to-know basis. Full disclosure puts too many at risk.

Crochet CentCom Command over and out.